Three things that scare me. Red lipsticks. Hipster fake glasses. (Not really hipster, but on another level of cool that I have yet to achieve) And the 80’s high side ponytail. It’s not that these things physically scare it, it’s just that I seem to lack the confidence to rock them. I guess I march to the beat of my own drum but the melody isn’t much different from everyone else’s.
Okay story time.
The other day I was running errands for my mother. If you didn’t already know, I’m always running errands for my mother. So she need me to return a sweater at Tj Max. As I walked in the store and stood in the exclusive “Return Only” line I spotted the cutest white male worker. Now this dude looked about my age (18/19- ish) Not only that but, he was like cute. *blush*
He had like the cutest curls. Picture a white guy with mixed (mulatto) curls. He had this effortless smile and he was starring at me in line! AHHHH! Maybe it was my cobalt blue jacket? But I still convincing myself that he was looking at me, looking into my soul! Anyways I made the returns and walked out of the store. But I did turn back one more time just to take one last look at the cutie. He was doing put-backs (Retail lingo– means he was putting stuff from the dressing room back on the racks). I was going to go peruse the racks before I left but I thought against it. (Sidenote: If you aren’t alreay aware you don’t really shop at stores like Tj Max. You hunt! Looking for a piece of treasure)
If you haven’t noticed I’m black. Shocker! But I’m pretty open minded. I’m open to date inter-racially. Like it’s 2012 people, let’s get with it. The problem is I’m so intimidated by white guys. I feel as though my chances of rejection from them skyrockets. Sometimes I even think maybe it’s not me… It’s them. Like do I have to scream that I’m not a stereotypical loud, attitude filled, gold-digger like the African American women portrayed in the media. I don’t want to put filters on the men I will date, because I don’t know what God has in store for me. This is so a Brandy Cinderella (1999) moment!
Oh well. I guess I’m just Ms. Independent waiting for God to send Mr. Incredible (The Incredible s are one of my favorite Pixar movies & I like strong dudes) 🙂